TL;DR
Wired senior writer Jason Parham argues that recent pushes for AI-driven dating assistants are overhyped. He contends that flirting and spontaneous, in-person encounters—what he calls cruising and meet-cutes—remain a fundamentally human practice that AI cannot fully replicate.
What happened
In a Wired piece published Dec. 31, 2025, Jason Parham critiques the wave of AI features and “bot wingmen” being promoted by dating apps and AI companies. Parham, who covers internet culture and the future of sex, frames flirting as a nuanced, embodied exchange — playful banter, dopamine hits, sexual subtlety and unsaid subtext — and argues that this craft resists automation. The article positions face-to-face meet-cutes and IRL cruising as the enduring alternative to algorithmic matchmaking. While the story documents the marketing of AI tools in dating, it stresses that Silicon Valley’s attempts to perfect human flirtation with models and assistants fall short of capturing the spontaneity and mutual risk that characterize real-world flirting. Specific product rollouts, user data, and long-term industry outcomes are not documented in the available excerpt.
Why it matters
- If flirting is inherently embodied and spontaneous, AI-driven messaging assistants may not achieve the emotional authenticity users seek.
- A cultural shift back toward in-person interactions could change how dating apps position themselves and which features they prioritize.
- Claims by companies about AI wingmen may be more marketing than a durable solution to the challenges of modern dating.
- Questions about whether automation can replace intimate social skills touch on broader debates about AI’s limits in human relationship domains.
Key facts
- The article was written by Jason Parham, a senior writer at Wired who covers internet culture and the future of sex.
- Publication date listed as December 31, 2025.
- Headline asserts that AI-powered dating is hype and that in-person cruising is the future.
- Parham describes flirting as involving playful banter, dopamine, sexual subtlety and subtext.
- The piece critiques Silicon Valley’s efforts to have AI ‘perfect’ flirting and notes dating apps and AI firms have been promoting bot wingmen.
- The illustration for the story is credited to James Marshall.
- Topics associated with the piece include dating apps, Tinder and artificial intelligence.
What to watch next
- Not confirmed in the source: whether dating platforms will scale back AI wingman features in response to user backlash or low effectiveness.
- Not confirmed in the source: whether a measurable resurgence of IRL cruising or meet-cute–or changes in user behavior—will emerge as a clear trend.
Quick glossary
- Bot wingman: An AI agent or feature designed to assist someone in initiating or sustaining romantic or flirtatious conversations on dating platforms.
- IRL cruising: Informal, in-person approaches or encounters where people meet and flirt face-to-face, often spontaneously in public spaces.
- Meet-cute: A memorable or charming first meeting between two prospective romantic partners, typically portrayed as serendipitous.
- Flirting: A form of social interaction where people use playful language, body language, and subtle cues to signal romantic or sexual interest.
Reader FAQ
Does the article say AI can replace human flirting?
No. The author argues flirting is an art that AI hasn’t perfected and implies AI falls short.
Are dating apps actively promoting AI wingmen?
Yes. The piece says dating apps and AI companies have been touting bot wingmen for months.
Will in-person cruising overtake app-based dating?
Not confirmed in the source.
Who wrote the piece and when was it published?
Jason Parham wrote it; publication date in the source is December 31, 2025.

JASON PARHAM CULTURE DEC 31, 2025 6:00 AM AI-Powered Dating Is All Hype. IRL Cruising Is the Future Dating apps and AI companies have been touting bot wingmen for months….
Sources
- AI-Powered Dating Is All Hype. IRL Cruising Is the Future
- Dating apps not working? Let an AI wingman do your flirting.
- The Rise of the AI Wingman
- AI 'wingmen' bots to write profiles and flirt on dating apps
Related posts
- Industrial software: AI is turning software development into mass production
- Query 600+ GB of Hacker News, arXiv and more using Claude Code tools
- We don’t need more contributors who aren’t programmers to contribute code