TL;DR

A reader for The Register reports his newborn cried when he tried to hold the child while wearing a Microsoft-themed festive jumper that includes legacy icons such as Clippy and Internet Explorer. The jumper was a prize from The Register's 2025 Christmas competition.

What happened

The Register published a reader-submitted anecdote in which a contributor known as Wolfetone won a Microsoft-themed festive jumper as part of the outlet's 2025 Christmas competition. Wolfetone had promised to wear the garment to mark the arrival of his second child, but the baby arrived early. According to Wolfetone, attempts to hold the infant while wearing the jumper prompt the child to cry. The garment — described in the story as bearing Microsoft artefacts like the Clippy assistant, the Internet Explorer logo, the MS‑DOS emblem and the MSN butterfly — appears to be the trigger in the anecdote. The piece offers lighthearted speculation about which motif might be distressing to the baby but stops short of a diagnosis or explanation. The report treats the episode as an offbeat human-interest item rather than a technical or safety story.

Why it matters

  • Legacy software icons remain culturally recognisable and provoke reactions beyond tech circles.
  • Human-interest moments like this highlight how corporate branding can enter everyday life in unexpected ways.
  • The anecdote illustrates how imagery and nostalgia can produce strong, immediate responses — even from infants.

Key facts

  • The Register ran the item on December 24, 2025; the piece was written by Richard Speed.
  • A reader using the name Wolfetone won a Microsoft-themed jumper in The Register's 2025 Christmas competition.
  • Wolfetone had pledged to wear the jumper for the arrival of his second child, but the baby arrived early.
  • Wolfetone reported that the infant begins to cry when he tries to hold the child while wearing the jumper.
  • The sweater features Microsoft-related icons mentioned in the story: Clippy, the Internet Explorer logo, the MS‑DOS logo and the MSN butterfly.
  • The Register's article frames the episode as an offbeat anecdote with playful speculation about which motif might upset the baby.
  • The article refers to the garment as Microsoft's 'Artifact Sweater' and notes the writer's amusement at seeing it used.

What to watch next

  • Whether the child becomes accustomed to the jumper over time: not confirmed in the source
  • Any response or comment from Microsoft about the festive knitwear: not confirmed in the source

Quick glossary

  • Clippy: A former Microsoft Office assistant icon, presented as an anthropomorphic paperclip in older Office releases.
  • Internet Explorer: A legacy web browser developed by Microsoft that was widely used in previous decades.
  • MS‑DOS: A legacy disk operating system used on personal computers in the 1980s and early 1990s.
  • MSN butterfly: A visual emblem associated with Microsoft's MSN brand and web portal.
  • Copilot: A general term Microsoft has used for AI-assisted features integrated into its products.

Reader FAQ

Did the baby suffer any harm?
Not confirmed in the source.

What exactly is the jumper?
A Microsoft-branded festive knit described in the story as bearing several legacy Microsoft icons; it was a prize in The Register's 2025 Christmas competition.

Who is Wolfetone?
Identified in the piece as a Register reader who won the jumper; no further personal details are provided.

Did Microsoft respond to the story?
Not confirmed in the source.

OFFBEAT 3 Sight of Clippy, Internet Explorer scares baby Reg reader introduces newborn to Microsoft ugly sweater. Child not amused Richard Speed Wed 24 Dec 2025 // 14:24 UTC Microsoft's latest line of festive…

Sources

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